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I keep a second pair of black dress shoes always shined and put to the side. I never wear them unless I have an unexpected event pop up where I will need perfectly shined shoes. I have a regular pair that I wear for work and shine them about once a month. Having this second pair waiting in the wings has proved very helpful over the years when I need to look my best on short notice.
I learned this little trick from the movie “An Officer and a Gentleman.” Richard Gere’s character had spare shined boots and buckles to help himself and his fellow cadets pass inspections conducted by their drill instructor. Of course, Gere’s character was eventually caught and punished for having the extras but to date, I have gotten away with it.
The movies have taught me many valuable lessons that you cannot learn out in the real world. Westerns taught me that it is completely unnecessary to reload your gun during a gunfight. I have watched countless westerns and very rarely do I see anyone stop to reload their six-shot revolver. I am pretty sure I’ve watched Randolph Scott or John Wayne kill 20 or 30 guys without every reloading. All these automatic guns with extended clips and such are just completely useless. Just get yourself a good old six-shooter and you will never have to worry about reloading it.
I have also discovered from movies that the airbags in cars are very, very smart. Airbags can sense when someone is in a high-speed chase. The airbag does not deploy when the driver bounces off other cars on the street or hits telephone poles or even rear-ends a cement truck. However, when a regular Joe has a minor fender bender in the Walmart parking lot they are immediately enveloped in the safety of the airbag. Isn’t technology amazing?
I have also learned that Superman has a second weakness beside Kryptonite. I loved watching the old “Superman” TV series from the 1950s that starred George Reeves. I noticed that every time Superman would confront a criminal who had a gun the criminal would fire his weapon at Superman and he would not even flinch. However, when the gun was empty the crook would then throw the gun at Superman and he would dodge the weapon. This leads me to believe that an empty gun, when thrown at Superman, would do him damage. Imagine what an empty gun made of Kryptonite would do.
Finally, I have learned from the movies that any timer attached to an explosive device is about 20 minutes off. We usually see the device ticking down with something like seven minutes until it explodes. However, our hero has to beat up a bunch of bad guys, drive down a busy street and climb four flights of stairs before he can get to the bomb. All this usually takes him about a half an hour. He usually arrives at the bomb with 15 or so seconds left. This means the clock on the bomb is very slow. Therefore, the next time I’m in a situation with a time bomb strapped to a fuel tanker I know I’ve got a good half an hour before I should start to worry.
My theories could have some holes in them. I mean why does Wyatt Earp’s gun never run out of ammo but Lex Luthor’s does? Hmmm … I may need to rethink some of my hypothesis but one thing I think we can all agree on is that Mr. Roarke is a great host and he and Tattoo run a fantastic island.
Editorial on 05/10/2020
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