Every Chris Hemsworth Movie, Ranked

Through an impressive combination of Australian charm, massive arms, and an Asgard’s amount of genuine talent, Chris Hemsworth has worked his way from the TV scene in his native Melbourne to becoming Hollywood’s literal god of thunder.

The 34-year-old actor — currently fresh off of back-to-back blockbusters Thor: Ragnarok and Avengers: Infinity War — has enjoyed what you’d call an uneven movie career. The highs are high, the lows are low, but that’s showbiz, baby, and nothing better exemplifies Hollywood than a 6’3″ blonde marble statue wielding a hammer.

Here, we rank every movie Hemsworth has appeared in, from worst to best.

Ca$h

As you can tell from the $ in the title, this independent crime-thriller — Hemsworth’s third movie role — thought it was very badass. It is…not. It’s actually one of the blandest films of the past ten years, but it at least offers the opportunity to watch a pre-Thor Hemsworth act across from Sean Bean, whom the cameras managed to catch sleepwalking through every scene.

Thor: The Dark World

This is by far the worst movie in Marvel’s 19-film universe, and that’s including a Hulk movie so forgettable it literally turned Ed Norton into Mark Ruffalo. The Dark World somehow makes Hemsworth un-charming, the villain is a particularly angry elf, and Natalie Portman — making her final MCU appearance — might as well have been checking her watch to see how much time was left.

The Huntsman: Winter’s War

Hemsworth and the rest of this shockingly A-List cast of Oscar-winners do their darndest to pull something out of this sequel to a Snow White reboot nobody asked for in the first place. Unfortunately, the sight of a bearded Chris Hemsworth in a leather jerkin just isn’t enough to build a franchise.

Red Dawn

Speaking of reboots nobody asked for! Hemsworth stars as a U.S. Marine alongside The Walking Dead‘s Jeffrey Dean Morgan in this incredibly incredibly ill-advised update of the 1984 North Korea invasion flick.

Snow White and the Huntsman

This is definitely a better movie than its sequel, but it’s still 80% Chris Hemsworth screaming about his dead wife at Kristen Stewart while walking through magical woods.

A Perfect Getaway

A Perfect Getaway is actually more like a perfectly okay thriller set in Hawaii that is improved ten-fold by Chris Hemsworth’s immaculately crafted goatee.

12 Strong

This is a pretty paint-by-numbers war movie — based on Doug Stanton’s non-fiction book Horse Soldiers — that tells the story of the first Special Forces sent to Afghanistan after 9/11, It’s fine, but it does get Hemsworth on-screen with extremely chill bar patron Michael Shannon and tricep master Trevante Rhodes.

Blackhat

Michael Mann’s 2015 techno-thriller would actually be kind of an amazing movie if it wasn’t also selling Chris Hemsworth — at this point in peak statuesque Thor shape — as a computer hacker.

In The Heart of the Sea

It’s Chris Hemsworth on an old wooden ship battling a big-ass whale. What more could you possibly want from a film? (Besides a scene where Chris Hemsworth literally punches the whale in the face, which would have rocketed this movie to #1.)

Ghostbusters

For all the hubbub it caused among the angry, keyboard-wielding trolls of the world, Paul Fieg’s reboot of the 1984 supernatural comedy turned out to be a harmless, funny, if not a little too long movie. The biggest surprise was Hemsworth stealing the entire show in one of his first straight-up comedy roles, a sign of Thors to come.

Star Trek

Hemsworth’s role as George Kirk is notable because it’s his first big-screen appearance after years of working television. But ultimately, this franchise belongs to another Chris.

Avengers: Age of Ultron

No assembling of Marvel’s greatest heroes is ever going to be a bad movie, but Joss Whedon’s follow-up to the first Avengers doesn’t come close to the heights of its predecessor. What definitely does not help is having Thor fuck off to a vision cave for half the movie and then returning without an explanation.

Vacation

The sole purpose of Chris Hemsworth’s appearance in the 2015 sequel to the Chevy Chase family trip comedy is a running joke about his massive penis. And you know what? That is perfectly okay.

Rush

Hemsworth’s best overall performance — you know, acting-wise — comes in Ron Howard’s racing biopic Rush. The Aussie actor plays real-life Formula 1 driver James Hunt in all his brash, golden-haired glory.

Thor

The movie that rocketed Hemsworth into superstardom faster than a spinning Mjolnir is also much better than people tend to remember. As a director, Shakespeare aficionado Kenneth Branagh gives this story about immortal super-powered gods acting petty AF toward each other the exact operatic touches it needs.

Avengers: Infinity War

Marvel’s latest — and by far biggest — blockbuster makes incredible use of Hemsworth’s god of thunder, primarily pairing him off with Bradley Cooper’s Rocket and Vin Diesel’s Groot for the buddy team-up road movie we never knew we needed. Major points off, though, because Thor didn’t just aim for Thanos’ goddamn head.

The Cabin in the Woods

Joss Whedon’s send-up and love-letter to all things horror is a dang masterpiece, and a huge part of why it works so well is Chris Hemsworth’s pitch-perfect casting as the jock from every scary movie ever made. “I’m coming back with cops, and choppers, and large fucking guns, and those things are going to pay,” are the best last words ever spoken.

The Avengers

Six years later, and this movie still undeniably owns. Nothing will ever quite top the feeling of Thor’s hammer hitting Captain America’s shield for the first time, to the tune of millions of nerds’ wildest dreams coming true for the first time.

Thor: Ragnarok

No movie has ever made better use of Chris Hemsworth’s talents than Taika Waititi’s brilliant, badass Thor: Ragnarok, the first Marvel Movie that didn’t feel so much like a Marvel Movie™. Funny, heroic, and self-deprecating all at once, this is Chris Hemsworth’s best movie, better than seeing a friend from work.

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